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a_riot_g
05 September 2009 @ 03:25 pm
i'm wearing a hat. i like it.

also, i don't want to go to work tonight. not that i have anything else to do with my life. I'm just really not in the mood. i'd rather sit at home and do nothing.

I have to get my sister's bday present still. Her birthday is tomorrow.
and i have to pick up a pizza at five. i don't want to do that either.

im not motivated at all right now.

lame post. whatever.
 
 
a_riot_g
19 June 2009 @ 08:34 pm
so now i'm posting to see if i did any of my new years resolutions lol

Resolutions:
1. Learn all the new music on my iPod (shouldn't take too long)....well i get new music a lot so i guess this will never be accomplished
2. Update my style to be 100% me.............................................................yes, grandma took me on a shopping spree ;)
3. Work my ass off in school/anything school related............................yes! pulled off all A's and a B for my final grades!
4. Make new friends (this is a must).........................................................sort of, not really...too much to explain...ugh
5. Get better at guitar/music in general...start a band?........................Well I guess i've gotten better/more creative? i practice...
6. Be healthier
...................................................................................... working on it....though at my physical today my doctor said i was perfect
7. Be stronger
......................................................................................idk what i meant when i wrote this...did i mean physically or mentally? w/e
8. Manage time better
.................................................uhm i think i'm pretty good at time management now..not at all when i'm stressed though
9. Outwardly express myself instead of always holding it in
........still need to work on this
10. simply improve upon myself in any way i deem necessary
..........was i on crack when i wrote this? what does this mean?

so all in all, i think i did decent with these though i havent really thought about them till now.
k bye.

 
 
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: need new music.
 
 
a_riot_g
05 June 2009 @ 08:59 pm
i just thought that would be a good title for a song, or a band, or an album or something...
but anyways i havent posted in awhile, i guess i'll just rant now.

Yesterday was my birthday. It was uneventful. I got warped tour tickets which was cool. but other than that. i had leftovers from my fam party the night before, and leftover cake hah. No I am not shunned, my mom made me another cake/cupcake thing but i preferred the other cake. Then i had to write an essay for my english final and study for a precalc test and a chem test. jeeze. I worked after school but got out early because not many people were there. I work at Dairy Queen btw.

At 6:30 i met up with two friends for a birthday dinner. I'll just call them H and R. H and R are both 21, as of yesterday, I am 17. And you know, sometimes it's not bad to have a bunch of friends who are older. I have a group of friends in their 20s, and sometimes they give really good advice, and they're just fun to be around. Plus i think i'm a bit mature for my age. However, on occasions when it is just me H and R they tend to have a lot more to converse about. For example, college, work (a plac ei couldnt get a job at), and their other friends etc. etc. don't get me wrong, it's always fun to see them because i don't get to often. But then again, when i do see them i'd like to have a bit more to say. They are like my sisters, i spent 2 whole summers with them plus the contact we kept between summers etc. It just sucks to feel left out, and i'm probably exagerating a bit seeing as they invited me out to eat and even paid for me. I feel selfish.  But then again, i don't often have plans/friends to hang out with because they are all older or live farther away or even both.

It sucks to be confused. i know that my friends, older and the same age love me. And i know they would never purposefully make me feel this way. It's wierd because if we are one on one i feel completely different. We're on the same page and they ask me questions and vice versa. Idk maybe it's just that weird age difference. idk we'll see how it goes i'm pretty sure i'm not just going to be dropped like that...

other than confusing situations i have finals next week...and SATs tomorrow and ACTs next saturday. Standardised (spelling?) testing is bullshit. nobody ever is going to be put in that situation again and how the fuck do you know me/judge me by a test score? what if i just don't do well on tests but i know the material? bullshit i say.

tomorrow i'm going out again for my birthday. idk if it'll be to exciting. i wish i could be 100% sure that i wouldn't get caught because i feel like it would be the perfect opportunity to get completely wasted and not care about anything, lose the stress of the final week of school. mind you, i've never even been near to being buzzed. i'd probably chicken out anyways.

writing like this makes me think, and sometimes i get sad. but now i'm thinking i dont have too much to be sad about, everybody has drama, confusion, stress...stop being a pussy. and i never use that word.

i thought i would have even more to say, but i guess i dont. I dont even need to read this again.
Every once in awhile i just need to rant. I wonder if i could rant in spanish?
 
 
a_riot_g
09 March 2009 @ 03:16 pm
Finally updating about my first Versa show! I'm just going to post the pictures of when i met all the band members and what happened :)

it's a loVE story, baby just say yes )
 
 
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: iPod
 
 
a_riot_g
28 February 2009 @ 03:25 pm
.  
I'm seeing Versa in a week.

so excited i dont even feel excited hah.
 
 
Current Mood: blank
 
 
a_riot_g
13 February 2009 @ 08:15 pm
Basketball: On tuesday our team beat the undefeated south shore league basketball champs (cohasset). We all played the best we've ever played. Our only point gurad didnt even play the second half b/c she got hurt and we still won! It's interesting b/c last year we were the last team to beat them before they went on an undefeated rest of the season, and they were undefeated this whole entire season until we beat them! so we were the first and last to beat them. Additionally, they got their tenth win on us (to qualify for tourney you need 10 wins) and we got our tenth win on them :) yayyy abington!

School: Has been tough lately, i study (admittedly not as much as i should be) but i just havent' been able to focus. This vacation couldnt have come at a better time. I plan to get caught up on everyyythinggg and relax though so i can put my full attention into school b/c basketball is over soon...sad b/c i love it, good b/c i have more free time.

Life in General:
1) I received an honorable mention in the Scholastic Art Awards for a series of pictures i took/altered in photoshop
2) I applied at peaceful meadows again and will be applying at dairy queen soon.
3) I bought a new camera and i have fallen in love
4) I've also fallen in love with a band called VersaEmerge. oh p.s. paramore is touring with no doubt soon...i think i told you that
5) I went home sick yesterday, still don't feel too hot but i gotta be well for my game tomorrow.
6)Not last weekend but the weekend before i had a sleepover with Kristen, Alyssa, and Steph. It was fun but since then i haven't done anything real fun with friends. Except tonight me and a few girls from bball went out to dinner. It's funny b/c this year i feel more accepted with the girls from basketball, and we are more friends than before (though idk if we are like hanging out friends...) but still.
7) I'm almost finished with my first song on guitar (no words yet)

i just wrote a novel....
 
 
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: VersaEmerge
 
 
a_riot_g
01 January 2009 @ 03:47 pm
I just had a strange impulse to write. I came up with these few lines in like 15 minutes...
I actually like how they sound because they go with some music i have been working on for guitar, i just have to get the timing down.

*untitled song?* :

Young girl please talk to me.
'Cause, I know there's something that you see
that just isn't right.

And I just can't believe
it's impossible for you to see
what's right in front of your eyes.
 
 
Current Mood: hungry
Current Music: Dear and the Headlights: Drunk Like Bible Times
 
 
a_riot_g
01 January 2009 @ 12:17 am
I was left with no friends for the night.

Sweet.

New Years Resolutions:

1. Learn all the new music on my iPod (shouldn't take too long)
2. Update my style to be 100% me
3. Work my ass off in school/anything school related
4. Make new friends (this is a must)
5. Get better at guitar/music in general...start a band?
6. Be healthier
7. Be stronger
8. Manage time better
9. Outwardly express myself instead of always holding it in
10. simply improve upon myself in any way i deem necessary


i just made these off the top of my head. they are probably bullshit. don't care. i just hope 2009 is good/better.
 
 
Current Mood: disappointed
Current Music: The Hoodies
 
 
a_riot_g
26 December 2008 @ 10:17 pm
Was soo fun! i got everything I wanted and had a good time. Hopefully the rest of vacation goes well :)
 
 
Current Mood: calm
 
 
a_riot_g
13 November 2008 @ 08:18 pm
"Leave Out All The Rest"

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are
 
 
Current Mood: anxious
 
 
a_riot_g
10 November 2008 @ 08:28 pm
I was reading all my past entries and i realized the majority of my posts involve paramore. makes sense. but from the looks of my journal it seems like they are my life....and they aren't the only thing i live for. They just make life easier lol.

but anyways. i'm pretty content right now. I dont have school tomorrow so that's pretty chill. I think i'm going out for pizza and i have a guitar lesson.

I got into national honors society!
umm i completely denied this fake-ass bitch, meredith that used to be my friend. she didnt get in and i laughed in her face. wow i'm mean.
Don't care.

umm what else can i update with? haha i probably should start writing everyday...

oh, i kinda wanna start a clothing company. once i get my designs done i think i'm gunna ask people what they think and see if it's even worth it. but idk it'd be cool to do that

and i wrote/am still writing another song. only i reallyyyyyyy have to figure out music to these songs i keep writing. i guess i'm looking for more inspiration or something. i wanna b unique~ lol

okay, bye.

p.s. Anberlin's new album "New Surrender" is amazing. best album of '08
 
 
Current Mood: content
Current Music: Anberlin- New Surrender
 
 
a_riot_g
22 October 2008 @ 06:38 pm
...  
why am i so confused all the time?

i wish i always knew what was gunna happen to me. and i wish i always knew what i wanted.

what i've noticed that has happened to me is that i realized i dont have to "follow the crowd" and i was like okay, i get that. so i'll dress how i like. and then i found myself just dressing like "your typical scene girl". it's not like i dont like what i wear. its just that i am stereotyping myself and also confining myself to that one specific part of myself. i love bands, and playing guitar, skinny jeans and vans and converse. okay. but i also love some girlie stuff, sporty stuff, and i own uggs. i need to recognize what suites me the best at all times, and find my own style that fits every part of me. not trying to be like hayley williams or a style i really do like but i dont have to be 100% of the time. (but i am totally not a fayley. i have just admired her style and used her as inspiration) but yeah. i need to get my head straight and figure it out, and do whats best for me.

rant~
but it felt good to write that
 
 
Current Mood: blank
 
 
a_riot_g
04 October 2008 @ 10:10 pm
This is the first song i ever wrote. idk if i'm done with it yet. but this is basically the finished product. i wrote it over the summer.
welp, here it goes.

And is it tomorrow yet?

Because I’m so sick of today,

And all of the things that happened

Through out all of these yesterdays.

 

You left me in the dark.

How I really wish you hadn’t

‘Cause my days are now uncertain.

And I can’t believe all of this

Would change you into a different person

 

[Chorus]

I know that the past is behind me.

I’m just scared for what I don’t know

Oh, what will become of me?

Tomorrow, tomorrow

Give me something to live for.

I need some sort of hope.

A hand, a light, a dream to follow,

Something to guide me into tomorrow

 

I’m stuck, here, sitting,

In memories of years past.

I guess it’s easy to stay here,

But I know these feelings won’t last.

 

Do you ever think of those days?

Oh we were free back then

Those days are over now

It’s sad but it is true.

I’ve been down for way too long

But somehow I’ll be strong,

I won’t be the one to loose.

 

[Chorus]

 

So leave it all behind (Is it tomorrow yet?)

Let it all go (Is it tomorrow yet?)

All of the things that happened

In all those yesterdays.

 

So, if you ever come back,

You better be the old friend I know.

And bring tomorrow with you when you come.

*end of song*


so yeah, what i'm feeling is that i'm not motivated right now. there is so much i want to do in my life, but i keep procrastinating and all that just doing pointless stuff instead of what i should be doing, and its not even like homework! its like, i wanna be better at guitar, and i do play alot. just i dont practice the basics which i should to get better, and its something i love to do! but i just dont idk its wierd. i need like a new song or somethingg to think about to get motivated. sometimes it helps to think of people i admire so i can like aspire to be like them i guess.

but yeah thats where i'm at right now.

 
 
Current Mood: lethargic
 
 
a_riot_g
22 September 2008 @ 07:12 pm
typing this entry to see if i can figure out how to change my icon.
 
 
a_riot_g
17 September 2008 @ 01:14 pm
so basically i said i'd update about the actual show on the 30th.

well basically we met some people, and then we got barricade. I'm bummed we didn't move to the center of the stage though cuz it would have been so easy to do and we were behind speakers. so that's the only part that sucked. but other than that, all the bands played soo good and jeremy fell during the pressure flip : / well that's about it lol i made a scrapbook about it which is intenseee. but seriously such a good show. indescribable


i just ate chinese food :) it was delish. andddddd i guess i started a trend at school? i bought BRIGHT vibrant orange and pink nail polish a little before school and i painted one hand orange and one pink at the beginning of school a few weeks later a girl Brittany has the pink and then another girl lauren has the orange and then another girl taylor wore orange too! and its like starting a chain reaction.
i'm bummed cuz i was unique before lol.

and now i have soccer. ugh we have to go like far away. and i dont want to. i'm bored. haha okay bye...
 
 
Current Mood: bored
Current Music: the new Dear and the Headlights songs
 
 
a_riot_g

MEETING PARAMORE!

[There are more times we saw them just hanging around the busses and driving in the van but these are the most important interactions]

1ST Encounter with Josh (like 11:30 a.m.):

(Josh comes out of the bus…I stare for a second.)

Me: Josh!

Josh *smiles and waves*

(Josh goes back into the bus)

2nd Encounter with Josh (afternoon):

(Josh comes out of Venue)

Me: Heyyy Josh.

Josh *smiles and waves*

(He may have said something but I couldn’t hear.

Then he enters the bus)

1st Encounter with Zac (like 11:45 a.m.):

(Zac comes out of the bus, while brushing his teeth,

I felt awkward and a little rude about this but oh well.)

Me: Zac!

Zac *waves*

Me: Hey, Zac? I brought a present for you guys.

Zac: Yeah?

Me: Could I bring it over to you?

Zac: Yeah *waves me over*

(Me, Brenda, and Alaina, and Casey [a girl we just met] walk over)

Security Guard (Jen K.): You can’t come inside the gate!!

Me: Zac invited me over…

Zac: *makes a face* Don’t worry you’re with me.

(I hand the present to him)

Zac: Thanks!

Me: You’re welcome!

Alaina: Hi, I’m Alaina!

Zac (with toothbrush in mouth): *points to himself* Zac.

(Zac looks at Brenda’s sweatshirt that says “Red Head” on it)

Zac: Is that a Red Head shirt?

Brenda: What? Yeah…

Zac: Like hunting? *accidentally spits toothpaste on Brenda* Hah

Brenda: What?

(That happens like 3 times because we couldn’t understand him because he had a toothbrush in his mouth)

Zac: Never mind. Hah.

Me: Well we’ll let you finish brushing your teeth.

Zac: Bye guys!

Us: Bye!

(Zac walks over to his suitcase)

Me: Hey Zac! When you’re done brushing your teeth could

we have a picture?

Zac: *nods*

(We weren’t able to get pictures b/c they got caught up in meetings and sound checks etc.)

2nd Encounter with Zac:

(Paramore was walking into the van to go to a meeting)

Zac: We’ll hang out later guys!

Encounter with Jeremy (afternoon):

(Jeremy walks out of the bus)

Me (and everyone): Jeremy!

Jeremy *smiles and waves*

Encounter with Taylor (afternoon):

(Taylor walks out of the bus on his cell phone)

Me: Taylor!

Taylor: “Hey guys.” *waves*

1st Encounter with Hayley (like 12:15):

(Hayley comes out of the bus in her pajamas…surprisingly she was wearing yellow Pink brand pajama pants from Victoria’s Secret)

Hayley * Sings Avril Lavigne’s song “With You” while looking in her suitcase*

(Then she looks at us and sings at us.)

*Walking onto the bus*

She sings to us: “I’m wiithh youuu!”

Me: That was beautiful Hayley! *I laugh*

Hayley *laughs and goes inside*

2nd Encounter with Hayley (like 12:30 p.m.):

(Hayley walks out of the bus again.)

Me: Hayley, do you think we could have a picture?

Hayley: Um, actually we have a meeting to go to, with Love 146, and I’m actually holding everybody up. ‘Cause I just woke up, *laughs* but possibly later.

Me: Oh, okay. No problem. Did you see the present I got you guys?

Hayley: What present?

Me: I gave a present to Zac earlier for you guys and he brought it on the bus.

Hayley: I haven’t seen it yet! And we’re going to a meeting now, but I’m sure they’ll show me after the meeting.

Me: Alright cool.

Hayley: How long have you guys been here?

Me: Um, since like 10.

Hayley: And what time is it now?

Me: Uhh…

Casey: Like 12:30.

Hayley: Oh okay, that’s not too bad.

*Hayley heads into the bus*

Hayley: See you guys!

Us: Bye!

3rd Encounter with Hayley (like 4:30 p.m.):

 (Hayley walks out of the venue after sound check)

Hayley: Hey guys.

Us: Hey!

Me: Hayley can we have a picture? (By now I think she probably thinks we are creepy stalkers, but that’s okay.)

Hayley: Actually, I really have to pack because we just found out we are flying to Seattle tomorrow when originally we thought we were taking the bus. So I have to pack now.

Me: Oh, okay.

Hayley: But um, we’ll definitely be hanging out later. I mean I know we have meet and greets and stuff but yeah…

Me: Alright, sounds good!

Hayley: Okay talk to you guys later and we love you!

Me: We love you!




P.S.!!!!  Jeremy (and possibly hayley and zac but it was too hard to tell) wore  my bracelets i gave  them in the gift i handed to zac!

 
 
Current Mood: calm
Current Music: Paramore still ringing in my ears.
 
 
a_riot_g
20 July 2008 @ 06:00 pm
OH YEAHH... .. i forgot. this should have been posted awhile ago but still.

I  got a response from hayley williams herself! so freaking in shock.

here it is:

paramoreband (</a></font></b></a>[info]paramoreband) wrote,
@ 2008-07-02 20:52:00
Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Track This  Flag  Next Entry
Current location:kansas!
Current music:Piebald
Entry tags:update, warped

i can't write another life
HELLO!

warped is ruling. two days in and i'm wishing we had longer to go. the set felt good today... aside from wanting to collapse from the heat, we had a blast. it's a bit sad we aren't doing any signings or anything this year. last year there was so much going on and this warped we are in and then right back out. man, i love this tour. saw katy perry and say anything today... both really good sets - after that, the rain scared me away so i didn't catch oreska band but i will tomorrow. and i have yet to get to a BBQ but i'm hoping that will happen tomorrow night!

KHTS Morning Show in the morning, so if you live in the Dallas area, check that shiz out ;)

alright - Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is on, i haven't seen the end so here i go...

love,
hayley



(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


</a></font></b></a>[info]a_riot_g
2008-07-03 02:45 am UTC (link) DeleteTrack This
heey hayy

love the piercing.
also i bought the H2o album cuz of you it's awesomeeee<3

i was also wondering if you had any tips for writing lyrics. like arrangements at rhyming etc?

(Reply to this)(Thread)


</a></font></b></a>[info]paramoreband
2008-07-03 02:53 am UTC (link) Track This
glad you love the record! (and the piercing..)

as far as writing goes... just write what you know.


sweet huh? basically love life.


and alsoooooo i pulled off all A's for my final averages on my report card. jacked upppp
 
 
Current Mood: blah
 
 
a_riot_g
20 July 2008 @ 05:48 pm

I'm bored and haven't posted in awhile. So I am. 

Basically, I haven't done anything really enjoyable lately. I've been working out, going to work, then chillin by myself.  I hang with friends every so often and that's fun. But then I go right back into my routine.

Whatever. I can just look forward to PARAMORE. In August. Also, i'm staying over my mom's friends house b/c the show is in a different state, and it should be exciting because my mom's friends son is HOTT and so is his friend. So, I'm really pumped. And the son texted me today so we could get to know each other better because we've only met like once. It was awesome<3

Now I'm going to make breakfast for dinner!


Oh yeah.. and the kid I like(d) and thought liked me back now has a girlfriend. Sweet.

and my friend (girl) broke up with my other friend (boy) and now I'm a tad in the middle even though they say they are gunna still be friends. but I talked to my guy friend today and i could tell he was crushed. i hate seeing him like this :(


p.s. i'm wondering what the word apathetic means. idk but i'm gunna put that down as my mood.

 
 
Current Mood: apathetic
 
 
a_riot_g
23 June 2008 @ 08:47 pm
[a Facebook message to my biffle]

so it started out with a big breakfast..delsish.

then we went on a small plane that held 7 people and we saw beautif landscapes of mountains and trees and i saw a moose. however, it was a bumpy ride and i got woozy and threw up with only effing 5 minutes left in the entire ride...HORRIBLE time. but then i felt better after.

then we walked and shopped. and ate. and lemme tell you they have a kickin' mall. it's like 5 stories with some good stores.

then we went on a trolley ride ( first lemme tell you that basically there's like 50 people in the city {exaggeration...but still}) and gues who gets in a trolley accident! me...

picture this- trolley (me) in the left lane..then a red car to the right then a good sized delivery truck. the truck switched lanes...oblivious to the red car...the red car slams into the part of the trolley where i am. i banged my knee and saw the whole thing and screamed hah. no real damage done to me...a little done to the trolley. but the red car was sandwitched. i was worried about the guy but he was fine i guess.

that was a mess. then we had to stay in the trolley and melt for lik 20 minutes before we could go back to the hotel and that's where i just got to when i sat down and wrote this to you...

me and andrew were texting today. and he said he'd call me this week or something. :)
 
 
Current Mood: chipper
Current Music: So I Thought-Flyleaf
 
 
a_riot_g
08 June 2008 @ 07:51 pm
im so confused.

i'm wicked stressed about finals. i wanna do so good. i put way to much pressure on myself to get straight a's....i wanna get a really successful job.

i think way to much about the future. but not enough about the near future.

my friend is like becoming depressed and i dont know how to help her. we arent as close anymore but still i wanna be there for her but really dont know what to do. i feel like she's confused, and stressed. i miss her.

i'm off to study. and maybe write.
 
 
Current Mood: gloomy
 
 
 
 

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